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Writer's picturesoarwsarah

They Owe You Nothing

Updated: Oct 10, 2023

You are not entitled to an explanation or understanding or validation. Not a single one of their words needs to be understood by you or even spoken to you about what others do and how they behave. There is not a soul on this planet that owes you any words or promises or even actions. Alternatively, we also do not owe another being anything in return. This is a what I have been observing in those around me.

So many people operate under this barter system. This belief they have fabricated in their moral mind about the give and take between people. I give you 20 years and you give me guaranteed happiness and security. I take your shitty treatment and you give me an apology. I give you a smile and you give me a boost of self confidence. I give you my attention and you give me your focus. I give you a promise and you give me your trust. Eventually, we come to expect something for every action we take, a counter action, reaction in our favour. We expect more and more and eventually, we begin to lose our gratitude and gratefulness. You don't get to set the wager price of interactions.

You don't get to say what other people 'should' do. They are not telling your story so of course their choices are not rooted in your benefit. Not everyone is going to react like you would. We all come with our unique experiences, traumas, stories, skills and baggage. How did you think there would be zero retaliation or consequences to your choices? Did you really expect there to be no response from another being? We are all entitled to choose and respond how we see fit, with the best of our capabilities and in the best capacity of love. We all just have different capacities.

Some of us are standing in a forest holding bird seed and getting upset when we get shit on. Every action has a reaction. We do not get to judge others' reactions.

We are all telling our own story and there is only one writer per soul, one main character. I can't write your story as I can barely navigate my own plot. Seeing others' choices through a lens of compassion and neutrality allows space for honesty and reasoning. However, most of us are so quick to cast judgement we rarely allow others a chance for understanding. I see it as a choice. We can continue to 'should' other people and live with wishing they behaved a different way or hoping things will change. Or we can truly say 'ok, my choice and power lies in how I react to this'. Who are you to judge anyways? Who ordained you with that right to cast black and white, never grey where compassion and understanding are found? Just who do you think you are?

You are human, just like me. We were brought to this Earth by a miracle and will leave by a stroke of fate. We do not hold the power of others nor do we own anything over them.




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